Today is the last day before Lent, Mardi Gras, Fat Tuesday. In modern times, it has come to mean that last day of indulging before the fasting of Ash Wednesday, a day to overdo it before that period of self-denial that, let's be honest, is a lot less strict that it used to be. It is also a day for many to decide what they are "giving up" for Lent. But these practices were not always so.
Back when Lent was a lot more stringent in its guidelines, Catholics were required to give up meat for the entire period. Since lard and other animal fats were commonly used in cooking, there was the desire not to be wasteful, so what was on hand was to be used up before Lent began (thus the "fat" in Fat Tuesday) in order not to have it go bad before Easter. Talk about a true, "farewell to the flesh," which is the basic meaning of "Carnival." Now, we're limited to Ash Wednesday and the Fridays of Lent and Holy Week for our meatless requirements, although all Fridays are technically still a requirement unless some other form of penance is done on non-Lenten Fridays, but my generation and the one after were not very well catechized on that.
Tomorrow, Catholics will go en masse to Mass and get the burnt remains of last year's palms smeared on their foreheads as a show of their religiosity, with it being impossible to determine who the regular churchgoers and the occasional ones are. Every Catholic is religious on Ash Wednesday. Palm Sunday, Christmas and Easter are also popular ones. But the ashes are not meant to be a sign of how great and faithful we are, but as a sign of our failure. We are a sinful people; I am a sinful man. We need to be reminded of how we have failed, so we can get up and try again, recognizing our total dependence on God and how any good we do comes from Him.
This is where giving up something can be a useful practice. The best things to give up are the things that distract us the most from God, fostering a spirit of detachment. If it's something that we can't have in our lives without it being a distraction, perhaps it's something we should do without even after Lent. But even things that are not sinful, but are enjoyable, can be good to give up. There is more to it though. If someone gives up chocolate for Lent, but then eats so much on Easter Sunday that he's throwing up, there's definitely been a lesson missed. Beyond giving something up, taking something on can be a good practice, whether it's a new devotion, taking more time for prayer or Scripture reading, getting to weekday Mass or giving more of one's time, talent and/or treasure for charity. Instead of just giving something up, take something on in its place.
Confession is probably the most underused, underrated part of Catholic life today. Most parishes still offer regular Saturday Confessions. Get in, and if you haven't been in for a while, tell the priest that at the beginning. I've met many a priest who has said there are few things they are happier to hear than, "It's been x years since my last Confession." It's like weeding the garden. The more often you go, the less you'll need to confess, and the greater accountability can help keep some of those spiritual weeds from growing back. Before I was born, but from what I heard from my mom when she was still alive, there was a time when Confession lines were longer and Communion lines shorter. Catholics knew more about mortal sin and were more discerning about not receiving in a state of mortal sin. It couldn't hurt to get back to that as a regular thing. I was once told Confession was like breathing. The human body can breathe once every three minutes and still maintain the bare essential functions to stay alive. To be in overall good health, however, requires more breathing than that. Catholics are required to go to Confession at least once a year, but more frequently, monthly for example, is recommended.
Back to Mass...well, that's actually the point I was making. I'm willing to bet that although this is not true of all Catholics who only show up a few times a year, there may be a good number out there who haven't started coming regularly on Sundays because nobody has invited them. I will confess that although I talk about the A&P and CAPE phenomenon and joke about the complaints of parishioners who are sick of only hearing "Silent Night" or "Jesus Christ Is Risen Today," I can't recall ever reaching out to those groups and inviting them to come back on Sundays. The real gift, the Eucharist is there, Jesus Christ, present in Body, Blood, Soul and Divinity. If the palms and the ashes really mattered, they'd give out palms at the end of every Sunday Mass and ask us to bring them back on Saturday to have Ashes at the beginning of Mass. Our Lord gives Himself to us sinful, unworthy people to make us worthy. If you haven't been in a while, I hope you'll be there not just tomorrow, but four days after that as well, and I owe you an apology if I haven't extended that invitation. I hope to see you there!
Tuesday, February 12, 2013
Monday, February 11, 2013
What Credibility Does Anyone Have?
I've been thinking about this a long time, and it seems whenever I do, something new happens that just increases it. As a culture, we seem to enjoy smugly holding up people's past mistakes as reason to tell them they have no credibility, sometimes on completely unrelated issues. The message, you did something bad, so you have a duty to keep your mouth shut and go along with everything you see, even if you think it's wrong.
The most blatant example of this is most obviously in attacks against the Church. People claim left and right that the Catholic Church is this judgmental institution labeled as everything from homophobic (which as a relative of people with REAL phobias I find truly insensitive to their plight) to an unscriptural whore of Babylon (ironic that we're called unscriptural when it was the Catholic Church that assembled the books that now make up the Bible). To bring down this judgmental institution, they love to bring up our past faults, completely blind to their own judgmental finger pointing. If I had a penny for every time I heard the Church had no right to speak out on issues like abortion because of the sex abuse scandal, a tithe from me would probably fund my parish's entire operational budget. But is it the sex abuse scandal, the abuse of children that truly concerns these people? Is what they're saying that the Church has no credibility because of abuse of children, but that we'll somehow gain credibility by being silent on the daily slaughter of thousands of children daily? Or do they just simply hate the Catholic Church's teachings? If so, they should be delighted whenever there is scandal within the Church, as every scandal throughout our 2,000 year history has come not when we lived up to Catholic teaching, but when we fell short of it. I know this is true of myself. I'm not embarrassed over the rare occasions that I've managed to let go, let God and live up to my beliefs as a result. Now the times I've messed up, the times I've failed, yes, the times I have greatly sinned, those make for some embarrassing, horrifying, heartbreaking and disgusting stories.
This judgmental attitude is of course not only directed at the Church from outside, but also from within the Church at non-Catholics and fellow Catholics alike. One of the people I follow on Facebook is Abby Johnson, who, for those who don't know, is a former director of a Planned Parenthood facility. One day, by the grace of God, she walked away from it, unable to continue on with what she was doing. God had reached in, changed her heart, and has now made her one of the more outspoken voices in defense of the unborn. She runs a ministry called, "Then There Were None," which helps people who are leaving the abortion industry to find work. I never met her, but her story inspires me as a true example of God's mercy and His ability to bring about change within people's hearts. When I read recently on her wall that there were people claiming to be Christians saying that abortionists and women who had abortions deserved the same fate as their victims, I was filled with a mix of emotions - annoyance, rage, pity, sadness - that after two millennia, we still don't get it. I mean, who among us has not sinned? Who among us truly deserves to walk this earth with its abundant beauty and natural treasures? Who really has the right to cast the first stone. Yes, we are called to make a proper judgment of actions, but we are not called to judge the state of a person's soul, as only God knows. Our actions can be disgusting, but our deep down, intrinsic, unchangeable value as children of God never goes away. I was once told the Church has the best self esteem program around that could be summed up in a couple sentences. You are a child of God. There is nothing so good you could ever do to deserve it, and nothing so evil you could ever do to change it. Imagine for a moment if we separated the sin from the sinner, and instead of saying, "That person is scum because [insert sin here]," we shouted in alarm, "That child of God is poisoning his/her soul with [insert sin here]! Warn that person and offer prayers for his/her conversion!"
This thinking that has been swirling around in my head was solidified yesterday at Mass as I was listening to the readings. The first reading has Isaiah standing before the very presence and glory of God, and realizing his sinful state, he laments, "Woe is me! For I am a man of unclean lips!" When his lips are made clean, not by his own efforts, but by the grace of God, represented by an ember, God asks, "Whom shall I send?" Isaiah responds, "Here I am. Send me." By today's finger pointing, I suppose we should say of Isaiah, whose book is one of the longest in the Bible, "What place does he have saying so much, that man of unclean lips? He should just shut up instead of prophesying like he does." The second reading has Paul talking about the commission given to the Apostles, and he mentions his own unworthiness. This is fitting, as before he became a Christian, he persecuted and was responsible for the jailing and killing of many believers. What credibility did he have? Maybe he deserved the same fate as he gave to so many other Christians. In the Gospel, Jesus begins calling men to be his Apostles, and asks Simon, son of John, to cast his nets out for a catch. Simon, who has been at it all day, says he hasn't caught a thing all day, but does as Jesus says. After catching a major haul, he begs Jesus, "Depart from me, Lord, for I am a sinful man." Even after he joins Jesus, he says and does a number of stupid things, always putting his foot in his mouth, recklessly rushing with a single sword to try to fight off the crowd that has come to arrest Jesus, and finally denying Him three times that same day. This is Peter? Cephas? The rock on whom Jesus builds His Church? But surely he lost that station when he denied Christ three times, as I've seen claimed by some fundamentalists, right? Some even claim the first "papal encyclical" was, "I don't know him! I don't know him! I don't know him!" But read on, because it appears they missed something. After the Resurrection, what was it that Peter said, not on his own, but with Jesus' prompting? "I love You. I love You. I love You." After each time, Jesus gives him a command, a responsibility to carry out, a commission that on one hand could be looked at as authority, or on the other as a duty to serve...or perhaps both.
The point is we're not doomed once we sin and fall short of the goal. We have to get up and try again. We're also not absolved from speaking out against immorality, injustice and sin in general just because of our own sins. In fact, it is often the most sinful God calls to be the greatest saints. Peter, Paul, Augustine, Francis, Mary Magdalene, and a host of others. The Church is not some social club for those who have reached perfection and can now suddenly join now that they are pure. The Church is a refinery, where people are in the process of being purified of their sins, and living in New Jersey and having driven through industrial areas in places like Newark, I know what refineries can smell like. There must be the constant reminder that those who may appear better or worse than we are also have to go through that purification. I sometimes get a spiritual inferiority complex when I'm around other people at Church, or wonder, "What if they saw my soul and my sins? What would they think?" That thinking is actually just as judgmental as considering myself better than others because I might not have some of the sins they have. Considering the fact that in some ways it doesn't give credit where credit is truly due, it could even be considered idolatrous. After all, if they have fewer sins and are more advanced in virtue than I, isn't it by the grace of the same God I turn to in order to overcome my own sins and advance in virtue? And if they happen to see where I've fallen short, I pray they'll have the courage to call me on it.
One final thought that might not be a popular reminder, but it has to be said anyway. At a time when "the 1%" are demonized in the media, they too are children of God. Jesus had something to say about the 99 and the 1, and we would do well to heed it, for He would leave the 99 to bring back the 1 lost sheep. And when that lost one is brought back, there is more rejoicing than over those who had no need of repentance. I've had many times when I've gotten lost, and Jesus has brought me back every time. Though I don't deserve it, Heaven rejoices over the likes of me. I am a repentant sinner. I am the 1%.
The most blatant example of this is most obviously in attacks against the Church. People claim left and right that the Catholic Church is this judgmental institution labeled as everything from homophobic (which as a relative of people with REAL phobias I find truly insensitive to their plight) to an unscriptural whore of Babylon (ironic that we're called unscriptural when it was the Catholic Church that assembled the books that now make up the Bible). To bring down this judgmental institution, they love to bring up our past faults, completely blind to their own judgmental finger pointing. If I had a penny for every time I heard the Church had no right to speak out on issues like abortion because of the sex abuse scandal, a tithe from me would probably fund my parish's entire operational budget. But is it the sex abuse scandal, the abuse of children that truly concerns these people? Is what they're saying that the Church has no credibility because of abuse of children, but that we'll somehow gain credibility by being silent on the daily slaughter of thousands of children daily? Or do they just simply hate the Catholic Church's teachings? If so, they should be delighted whenever there is scandal within the Church, as every scandal throughout our 2,000 year history has come not when we lived up to Catholic teaching, but when we fell short of it. I know this is true of myself. I'm not embarrassed over the rare occasions that I've managed to let go, let God and live up to my beliefs as a result. Now the times I've messed up, the times I've failed, yes, the times I have greatly sinned, those make for some embarrassing, horrifying, heartbreaking and disgusting stories.
This judgmental attitude is of course not only directed at the Church from outside, but also from within the Church at non-Catholics and fellow Catholics alike. One of the people I follow on Facebook is Abby Johnson, who, for those who don't know, is a former director of a Planned Parenthood facility. One day, by the grace of God, she walked away from it, unable to continue on with what she was doing. God had reached in, changed her heart, and has now made her one of the more outspoken voices in defense of the unborn. She runs a ministry called, "Then There Were None," which helps people who are leaving the abortion industry to find work. I never met her, but her story inspires me as a true example of God's mercy and His ability to bring about change within people's hearts. When I read recently on her wall that there were people claiming to be Christians saying that abortionists and women who had abortions deserved the same fate as their victims, I was filled with a mix of emotions - annoyance, rage, pity, sadness - that after two millennia, we still don't get it. I mean, who among us has not sinned? Who among us truly deserves to walk this earth with its abundant beauty and natural treasures? Who really has the right to cast the first stone. Yes, we are called to make a proper judgment of actions, but we are not called to judge the state of a person's soul, as only God knows. Our actions can be disgusting, but our deep down, intrinsic, unchangeable value as children of God never goes away. I was once told the Church has the best self esteem program around that could be summed up in a couple sentences. You are a child of God. There is nothing so good you could ever do to deserve it, and nothing so evil you could ever do to change it. Imagine for a moment if we separated the sin from the sinner, and instead of saying, "That person is scum because [insert sin here]," we shouted in alarm, "That child of God is poisoning his/her soul with [insert sin here]! Warn that person and offer prayers for his/her conversion!"
This thinking that has been swirling around in my head was solidified yesterday at Mass as I was listening to the readings. The first reading has Isaiah standing before the very presence and glory of God, and realizing his sinful state, he laments, "Woe is me! For I am a man of unclean lips!" When his lips are made clean, not by his own efforts, but by the grace of God, represented by an ember, God asks, "Whom shall I send?" Isaiah responds, "Here I am. Send me." By today's finger pointing, I suppose we should say of Isaiah, whose book is one of the longest in the Bible, "What place does he have saying so much, that man of unclean lips? He should just shut up instead of prophesying like he does." The second reading has Paul talking about the commission given to the Apostles, and he mentions his own unworthiness. This is fitting, as before he became a Christian, he persecuted and was responsible for the jailing and killing of many believers. What credibility did he have? Maybe he deserved the same fate as he gave to so many other Christians. In the Gospel, Jesus begins calling men to be his Apostles, and asks Simon, son of John, to cast his nets out for a catch. Simon, who has been at it all day, says he hasn't caught a thing all day, but does as Jesus says. After catching a major haul, he begs Jesus, "Depart from me, Lord, for I am a sinful man." Even after he joins Jesus, he says and does a number of stupid things, always putting his foot in his mouth, recklessly rushing with a single sword to try to fight off the crowd that has come to arrest Jesus, and finally denying Him three times that same day. This is Peter? Cephas? The rock on whom Jesus builds His Church? But surely he lost that station when he denied Christ three times, as I've seen claimed by some fundamentalists, right? Some even claim the first "papal encyclical" was, "I don't know him! I don't know him! I don't know him!" But read on, because it appears they missed something. After the Resurrection, what was it that Peter said, not on his own, but with Jesus' prompting? "I love You. I love You. I love You." After each time, Jesus gives him a command, a responsibility to carry out, a commission that on one hand could be looked at as authority, or on the other as a duty to serve...or perhaps both.
The point is we're not doomed once we sin and fall short of the goal. We have to get up and try again. We're also not absolved from speaking out against immorality, injustice and sin in general just because of our own sins. In fact, it is often the most sinful God calls to be the greatest saints. Peter, Paul, Augustine, Francis, Mary Magdalene, and a host of others. The Church is not some social club for those who have reached perfection and can now suddenly join now that they are pure. The Church is a refinery, where people are in the process of being purified of their sins, and living in New Jersey and having driven through industrial areas in places like Newark, I know what refineries can smell like. There must be the constant reminder that those who may appear better or worse than we are also have to go through that purification. I sometimes get a spiritual inferiority complex when I'm around other people at Church, or wonder, "What if they saw my soul and my sins? What would they think?" That thinking is actually just as judgmental as considering myself better than others because I might not have some of the sins they have. Considering the fact that in some ways it doesn't give credit where credit is truly due, it could even be considered idolatrous. After all, if they have fewer sins and are more advanced in virtue than I, isn't it by the grace of the same God I turn to in order to overcome my own sins and advance in virtue? And if they happen to see where I've fallen short, I pray they'll have the courage to call me on it.
One final thought that might not be a popular reminder, but it has to be said anyway. At a time when "the 1%" are demonized in the media, they too are children of God. Jesus had something to say about the 99 and the 1, and we would do well to heed it, for He would leave the 99 to bring back the 1 lost sheep. And when that lost one is brought back, there is more rejoicing than over those who had no need of repentance. I've had many times when I've gotten lost, and Jesus has brought me back every time. Though I don't deserve it, Heaven rejoices over the likes of me. I am a repentant sinner. I am the 1%.
Saturday, February 2, 2013
I Really Don't Follow the Groundhog
OK, so I'm a day late, really two days, as I should have had my February resolutions ready to go by January 31, so I could have actually started them on the 1st. Not a good way to start the shortest month of the year, but first a recap of January.
I completed three out of the five January resolutions. The two incomplete ones were christening the brew kit and finishing the book I got for Christmas on how to brew. My other three were done, as well as being mostly faithful to the Fab Abs workout. I had a couple times when I was injured, and I thought it wise to take a couple days to recover and get back to it. Still, I reached the point of being able to do 30 push-ups and plank for over two minutes, as well as getting up to 75 crunches (sit ups are too much on the back right now). Not a 100% success, but nowhere near as much a failure as if I hadn't tried at all. Time to step it up.
Fitness goal, 90 crunches, 40 push-ups, three minute plank. I'm going to create my own schedule to get there. In addition, my February focus is to find a good leg workout, hopefully one that can add both strength and size. I've complained about my legs most of my life, and for a few years I was actually self-conscious about wearing shorts. I kind of still am, but no longer to the point where I won't wear them. It's the truth that I stand on a pair of long, skinny legs, and I wouldn't mind having the problem of having to get a couple new pairs of pants because my old ones just can't accommodate the extra circumference of my newly bulked tree trunks. But seriously, if I can find a workout this month that, faithfully employed, adds an inch or two around for the year, I'm a happy man. I don't have machines, a barbell or a budget to get either, so I may need to get creative. I have bands, and I think they can be incorporated. The point is to get started doing it until it becomes a regular routine, no complaining, just doing. Oh, and if anyone knows of any workouts good for building leg strength and mass, feel free to share them. Even if I have a good routine by the time you share it, I can always tweak the existing one.
Enough waiting on the brewing. I want it done this week. The one Judy got me with the kit is a dark brown ale, and after brew day is a two week fermentation period, then another two weeks after bottling, and it looks like that brew is good for cold weather. As for the book, I need to get a little cooperation from life on giving me some reading time. So no more crises that involve anything that can't be handled without me.
Musical goal remains the same, one song written, start to finish. If I finish one that I already had the idea for, that doesn't count. I've had an idea for a musical, or maybe a concept album, still undecided, and decided yesterday to start working on the Intro/Overture. A prog rock song in the shortest month? What am I thinking? Ever since I performed Felix Mendelssohn's "Elijah" with the Catholic University chorus in the spring of 1993, I was intrigued by the idea of an intro with singing before the overture. It seemed to break the rigid musical rules we were told to obey, only to break them elsewhere, and so the rebellious side of me embraced that. So my second musical...or first concept album...will have an intro before the overture, unlike "Chrysalis," which has no overture at all. I have a couple other musical ideas long buried in my head digging their way out of the grave like zombies, except instead of craving brains, they crave completion, performance and recording. I suppose a zombie wouldn't have the capacity to say that, though, so these undead song ideas are probably a little smarter. I mean, how many zombies do you know that understand anything about 7/8 time?
I think those are reasonable expectations for February. It's enough to keep me busy, but not so much that I'm sabotaging myself. Here's hoping and praying I improve on January's results. I didn't win the race to keep those resolutions, but I got out on the track and ran it. Maybe that's the most important part of all this. God knows we're imperfect, but still expects us to try, continuing to get up and keep going when we fall. I don't know if the groundhog saw his shadow, but I say a new springtime is beginning to bud in me. I can't wait to see what grows.
I completed three out of the five January resolutions. The two incomplete ones were christening the brew kit and finishing the book I got for Christmas on how to brew. My other three were done, as well as being mostly faithful to the Fab Abs workout. I had a couple times when I was injured, and I thought it wise to take a couple days to recover and get back to it. Still, I reached the point of being able to do 30 push-ups and plank for over two minutes, as well as getting up to 75 crunches (sit ups are too much on the back right now). Not a 100% success, but nowhere near as much a failure as if I hadn't tried at all. Time to step it up.
Fitness goal, 90 crunches, 40 push-ups, three minute plank. I'm going to create my own schedule to get there. In addition, my February focus is to find a good leg workout, hopefully one that can add both strength and size. I've complained about my legs most of my life, and for a few years I was actually self-conscious about wearing shorts. I kind of still am, but no longer to the point where I won't wear them. It's the truth that I stand on a pair of long, skinny legs, and I wouldn't mind having the problem of having to get a couple new pairs of pants because my old ones just can't accommodate the extra circumference of my newly bulked tree trunks. But seriously, if I can find a workout this month that, faithfully employed, adds an inch or two around for the year, I'm a happy man. I don't have machines, a barbell or a budget to get either, so I may need to get creative. I have bands, and I think they can be incorporated. The point is to get started doing it until it becomes a regular routine, no complaining, just doing. Oh, and if anyone knows of any workouts good for building leg strength and mass, feel free to share them. Even if I have a good routine by the time you share it, I can always tweak the existing one.
Enough waiting on the brewing. I want it done this week. The one Judy got me with the kit is a dark brown ale, and after brew day is a two week fermentation period, then another two weeks after bottling, and it looks like that brew is good for cold weather. As for the book, I need to get a little cooperation from life on giving me some reading time. So no more crises that involve anything that can't be handled without me.
Musical goal remains the same, one song written, start to finish. If I finish one that I already had the idea for, that doesn't count. I've had an idea for a musical, or maybe a concept album, still undecided, and decided yesterday to start working on the Intro/Overture. A prog rock song in the shortest month? What am I thinking? Ever since I performed Felix Mendelssohn's "Elijah" with the Catholic University chorus in the spring of 1993, I was intrigued by the idea of an intro with singing before the overture. It seemed to break the rigid musical rules we were told to obey, only to break them elsewhere, and so the rebellious side of me embraced that. So my second musical...or first concept album...will have an intro before the overture, unlike "Chrysalis," which has no overture at all. I have a couple other musical ideas long buried in my head digging their way out of the grave like zombies, except instead of craving brains, they crave completion, performance and recording. I suppose a zombie wouldn't have the capacity to say that, though, so these undead song ideas are probably a little smarter. I mean, how many zombies do you know that understand anything about 7/8 time?
I think those are reasonable expectations for February. It's enough to keep me busy, but not so much that I'm sabotaging myself. Here's hoping and praying I improve on January's results. I didn't win the race to keep those resolutions, but I got out on the track and ran it. Maybe that's the most important part of all this. God knows we're imperfect, but still expects us to try, continuing to get up and keep going when we fall. I don't know if the groundhog saw his shadow, but I say a new springtime is beginning to bud in me. I can't wait to see what grows.
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